Eggsellent
You know at the start of every New Year, you do the whole resolution thing? I’ve done resolutions every year since I was born. But I always ended up going back to pre-New Year me, with more vigour. It ain’t good. But I read a statistic the other day that said that only 8% of people stick to their New Years resolutions. I should probably state right around now that I am not on your back, I am just here to tell you that I am the morning master. I used to bloody hate mornings and would surface at like 10am – usually with a bad attitude. But then I sorted my life out and created the best morning tips ever. And I love you so sharing is caring.
After going through 2-3 months of mental insomnia, I decided that I wasn’t dealing with any more of my sleep shit. Being a morning asshole wasn’t working for me. Feeling groggy every time I woke up was balls. Not eating until 11am and then wondering why I needed three McDonalds at 1pm wasn’t the dream. I was sold a lie.
What Up Oprah?
Only read on if you are prepared to listen to a born-again morning person. It’s going to be shiny, sunny and slightly hippie. And you’ll probably think, “oh shit, this is so far from what is possible of me.” And that’s cool. Cause that was me. But now Imma be a boss. I am also going to state right now that I have no kids. But don’t let that turn you off because I have done my research. It turns out that this method works for multiple baby mamas too. Introducing the best morning tips from an AM angel.
1. Get Up 1 Hour Earlier
You don’t need to do the whole hour straight away. I started with setting my alarm half an hour earlier and then increased it by 5-10 minutes a day until I got to where I wanted to be. I now get up at 6.30am every morning. Those words would have made me spew on myself last year. I just didn’t think it was feasible.
But why get up earlier? If you’re going to get up earlier, you need to make it all about you.
2. It’s All About You
Would I get up an hour earlier if it meant getting extra washing done? Not a fecking chance. Would I get up an hour earlier to tidy the house? Spew. No way. You need an incentive to get up earlier. My incentive is an hour of unspoilt self-development with the sunrise with no communications, no emails and no phone. I’ll do a mini-plan further down on exactly what my mornings look like. You know, for inspo, and stuff. But if there is one thing that you take away from this, it is to make your earlier morning all about you. Whether it’s reading, watching telly, shoving on a face mask or silently praying in a corner that you’re kids won’t break you today, do it. Whatever. It. Takes.
3. A Kick Up the Bum from Colgate
The moments after waking up and thinking “Nah, not today Satan” and getting yourself out of the bedroom need to be filled with Colgate. Who’d have known that instantly brushing your teeth would be the kick up the arse that you need to start your day? And it can be a daunting thought when all you want to do is go back to bed and “shnuggle.” But the sooner you brush your teeth, the more awake you will feel. If you’re feeling extra cocky, wash your face.
4. Caffeine and Hydration
After teeth-gate (or Colgate), get straight to the kitchen and climb into a glass of water. Hydration is everything. And caffeine. I hate coffee cause it tastes like ass so I get my kick from fizz sticks by Arbonne. Mostly because they are the best caffeine supplement I can find. Any alternatives? Drop me a comment. I pair my fizz stick with a mug of peppermint tea. Both of which have a hell ton of water in them. Hydration and caffeine = alive human.
5. NO Phones
I charge my phone in another room, on flight mode. You do not want to see any crap from the internet first thing in the morning. I am my most productive and alert in the mornings (nowadays, never used to be) and if I was to open social media, lord knows what I would see. Your life is about you, with some input from others. But your morning should start with you. Queen. I may be up at 6.30am but I don’t look at my phone for at least the first 2 hours of the day. My hours.
6. Self-Development
I can’t even. Where do I begin? Self-development is absolutely massive and one of the best morning tips. It has allowed me to become a morning person. It has allowed me to take a step back from the stuff that drags me down. I have changed my life with self-development. And there are so many forms of the stuff available. Reading, Podcasts, YouTube videos, meditation. Although I don’t meditate cause I would fall asleep in the first three minutes. Meditation makes me sleepy and it can be tough enough to get up in the morning without that pressure.
7. The Tunes
Before I officially “start my day” and after I’ve done all my self-development, I usually blast some “interesting” choice tunes, to wake the whole house (and region) up. Anything that makes me happy. Usually a mix of Disney and old musicals. Jump about like a sponge for a couple of minutes, it adds a little bit extra fire.
My Morning Routine: Best Morning Tips
I know you’ve wanted nothing more in life but to see how this Queen does mornings (just let me have my moment, I am a born-again morning person after all). So here are some of my best morning tips. Do it, do it, do it now. Say it, say it, say it now. I have noted the name of the alarm at the start of each time because I think how you speak to yourself through technology is really important. I try and add to my mornings every couple of weeks. My next goal is fitness related.
6.30am – Morning Queen. Up with the lark, no snoozing. Snoozing is bad news. Teeth brushed, caffeine and hydration created.
6.45am – Strength reading *sparkle emoji*. I use a highlighter and pen to take notes. This is also when I “down” my caffeine. Don’t down coffee though. That ain’t a good idea.
7am – Strength Watch *strong arm emoji*. I am a huge fan of Rachel Hollis but just about any TED talk for motivation is also good for my jam.
7.15am – You’re Worth It *love heart emoji*. Positive affirmations and gratitude. Both of which can be found on YouTube. Start small, with 2-5 minute long videos. Simply searching “gratitude” or “affirmations” on Youtube should be enough.
7.30am – Get Fly. This is when I get dressed and sometimes throw on a face (if I can be assed).
8am – Share the love. This is where I update my socials or create a blog like this, aimed to help people, make people laugh, feel inspired or just to be kind in general.
